Saturday, 25 August 2007

A Quayle in the hand is worth, er, about the same as Bush


Came across a Dan Quayle quote today:

I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change.

Ahhh. Brought back all the good memories of how much joy this Vice President's (1989-93) cock ups used to bring.

*voiceover as for ad.s such as Greatest 70's Hits* Do you remember this one?

In 1992 when Dan Quayle visited a Trenton school for a photo op: He asks a kid to spell potato, kid writes on the blackboard 'potato', Quayle looks at the flash card in his hand to check (really, would you have checked the spelling of potato?) and, because the card says 'potatoe' he tells the kid to put an 'e' on the end. (I was in the States and Canada in the months following this and it was huge.)

The Trenton kid wowed the Letterman audience. He told of the spelling bee, saying, "I knew he was wrong, but since he’s the vice president I went back to the blackboard and put an e on the end and went back to my seat."

Well, Dan Quayle did say: "I've never professed to be anything but an average student."

No kidding.


Quayle can readily compete with Bushisms.

Just to remind you of some Bushisms:

"You work three jobs? … Uniquely American, isn't it? I mean, that is fantastic that you're doing that." —to a divorced mother of three.

"We’ve got an issue in America. Too many good docs are getting out of business. Too many OB-GYNs aren’t able to practice their love with women all across this country.”

"The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country."

“Peace will come to the Middle East only after everyone stops fighting.”

To those of you who receive honors, awards and distinctions, I say, well done. And to the C students, I say: you too can be president.Bush got into Yale with only C grades. Dan Quayle's major at college was political science, in which he mostly got D's.

And, er, Quaylisms:

A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls.

Bank failures are caused by depositors who don't deposit enough money to cover losses due to mismanagement.

Hawaii has always been a very pivotal role in the Pacific. It is in the Pacific. It is a part of the United States that is an island that is right here.

I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix.

I want to be Robin to Bush's Batman.

I was known as the chief grave robber of my state.

I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn't study Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people.

It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.

Republicans have been accused of abandoning the poor. It's the other way around. They never vote for us.

The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history... I mean in this century's history... But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century.

Votes are like trees, if you are trying to build a forest. If you have more trees than you have forests, then at that point the pollsters will probably say you will win.

We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world.

Can you imagine if Quayle had been VP to Bush dub-ya instead of Bush senior?


Strangely, the other quote I came across today was George Orwell: The quickest way of ending a war is to lose it.
(The third quote I saw was - just to prove I'm not making this up - "Health food makes me sick" C Trillin. But I think I'll save the dangers of carrot juice and the toxic effects of overconsumption of Vitamin A for another thought provoking post if it's alright with you.)

I'm sure you heard the other day how Bush, who said in April 2004 that the current Iraq war could not be compared to Vietnam, now compares it!

He reckons that it would have been best if the US had stayed in Vietnam longer, completely ignoring the long held and popular belief that they should have left Vietnam years earlier than they did. And, like Iraq, probably shouldn't have interfered in the first place.

Also, it just brings to people's attention again how much a mess both wars have been regarding faulty US strategy and flawed decision making.

Yup, smart move.

Worse, he also compared the conflicts in Iraq to those in Cambodia:

"In Cambodia," Bush said, "the Khmer Rouge began a murderous rule in which hundreds of thousands of Cambodians died by starvation and torture and execution"

[Er...] The Khmer Rouge slaughter was not caused by the U.S. withdrawal from Indochina in 1973, but by the U.S. escalation of the war and intervention into Cambodia in the years prior to that time.

(Taken from this article.)


Maybe ol' Johnny hangs around these dumb Yanks just to look rool intelligent (if also a bit short).

Mind you, Kyle Sandilands would probably look bright and fair-minded against the likes of Bush and Quayle.