not geek enough

Well, I tried to be all fancy-shmancy and have a lovely fresh new stylish lovely glam template (it was really nice - went well with my sub-header)... but I lost all my links and widgets and bits and pieces. And it wouldn't let me put them back (so guess what I've been doing the past hour).

Pretty template... but stubborn and inflexible - that's what you get when they're free.


Now, I'm sure this would have been fine and I could have, with a bit of html expertise, got everything working again. But as it turns out I'm not geek enough to manage it.


20% Geek
I could barely get that damn icon in here.


Really, at only 20% it's a wonder I have a blog at all.


While I'm on the geek thing I was wondering: Does anyone else use a browser (see, I'm not even sure that is the right term) for reading blogs and such?

I use Google Reader and I find it really handy for letting me know when someone, esp those who might not be regular posters, has a new post.

But I've heard some comments lately on people's blogs - such as, 'I've been checking your blog every day for new posts...' - that makes me think that some people might be even less geek than me! Could this be possible?

Schoolyard boys

Mai has a story of when she broke a boy's arm at school. I was reminded of this recently and recalled that I too broke a guy's arm at school. Although I'll admit I was less hands-on than Mai (who is quite the formidable opponent). Was no 'hands-on' at all actually.

I was going to elementary school in the US at the time. The boy whose arm I was to break sat next to me in my Year Three class. His name was Chad. Yes, seriously.

Anyway, Chad had the hots for me. It was so serious that he gave me scratch n' sniff stickers. The good ones too, like grape. The attention was nice at first but then it got creepy. He would follow me all day, keep trying to talk to me or touch me. Every time I looked around he'd be nearby and staring at me. I think he even stole from my lunch box and followed me home from school.

It got so that I felt sick at the thought of going to school and tried to get out of it. I'd try the stomachache approach - cause I really did have one I was that anxious. And then came the tears but they were real too cause I was shit scared.

Neither worked.

Mum didn't understand why I didn't want to go. If I'd known all that grown-up, handy stuff called 'wisdom' and 'experience' I'd have said, 'Cause I'm being stalked by a maniac loser called Chad!!!'. But for some reason I was unable to get my point across.

Fortunately, it turned out that Chad's eagerness to impress me solved my problem. The school playground had a great, towering jungle gym. A high metal structure made of lots of crossed over poles so it looked like lots of cubes [see pic but imagine it, you know, without the birds].

Anyway, I recall walking past this contraption set on the sawdust that is abundant in US playgrounds (on the west coast in the 80s at least). Ol' Chad had climbed up to the top with his mates and was intent on showing off. He was doing some sort of daredevil contortion hanging off the side of it whilst looking down at me to see if I was impressed with his grand display of acting like an utter monkey.

I believe I thought something along the lines of, 'That idiot, I hope he falls off', turned my head and heard THUD, 'Aah!'. I looked back to see Chad covered in sawdust and holding his arm. He started crying. Chad really wasn't doing a good job of impressing me.

I believe it was not only me but Chad too who considered this my fault. He still looked at me after that but kept his distance and it was more of a scowl than his previous puppy-dog look.

I don't recall him staying at the school for much longer either.

Hopefully it taught him to desist with his stalkerish ways!

-----

I'll admit I wasn't the toughest kid in elementary school but I did enjoy a bit of a tumble with the boys (the cute ones - still do).

My favourite game was when they would come and chase me and grab me - after I slowed down so they could catch me of course. The boy or boys would then pin my arm up behind my back in a half nelson and roughly escort me back to their hide out, ie. some isolated, grotty corner of the school grounds. They never hurt me cause my arms are quite long and flexible but I acted like it hurt of course, all part of the game acting helpless and such.

Not surprisingly, back at the hide out I would soon escape. The boys seemed a little relieved at this as they likely didn't really know what to do with me. A bit of a fight to escape was always fun too.

And then of course they'd catch me again...

-----

Now these boys giving me half nelsons were my friends. When I had a real fight it was only with my true enemies. The creepy boys who would call you names or pull your hair, laugh when you walked past or, horrors, make faces at you. These boys I usually kicked in the shins.

I recall there was one boy who did all this but was quite keen on me all the same. He wouldn't let me alone but I was pretty tough by now and fiercely held his soft little-boy hand and dug my thumbnail deep into the top of it. I did this each time I saw him. Scary eh? Although I stopped after he begged me. And I saw he had a dozen or more fierce looking scabs on his hand. And he was looking sad and scared. Poor boy. (I wonder if they scarred.)


Mind you it worked, he stopped bugging me. Took the hint. (Now why didn't I try that with my last boyfriend when he persisted after I ended it?... I suppose because his big hairy man-hands are pretty tough. *sigh* Life was much simpler when I was eight.)

-----

The fight I best remember at elementary school was one of those proper 'fights to end all fights' with my main male enemy. No more little skirmishes, it had to be decided once and for all. This fight was arranged formally by time and place. Yes, serious stuff.

We each had two friends with us as support. We faced off in the sawdust playground... And I kicked the shit out of him until he was flat on the ground.

Yay! I won!

I turned and began walking to my equally happy friends... whose faces suddenly fell just before I was shoved hard in the back. Bam! Down I went. And that stupid creep laughed and guffawed his head off like he'd won. Loser.

Cheat.


Dumb boys.


-----

You all have similar schoolyard tales, yes?

...
...

A Quayle in the hand is worth, er, about the same as Bush

...


Came across a Dan Quayle quote today:

I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change.


Ahhh. Brought back all the good memories of how much joy this Vice President's (1989-93) cock ups used to bring.


*voiceover as for ad.s such as Greatest 70's Hits* Do you remember this one?

In 1992 when Dan Quayle visited a Trenton school for a photo op: He asks a kid to spell potato, kid writes on the blackboard 'potato', Quayle looks at the flash card in his hand to check (really, would you have checked the spelling of potato?) and, because the card says 'potatoe' he tells the kid to put an 'e' on the end. (I was in the States and Canada in the months following this and it was huge.)

The Trenton kid wowed the Letterman audience. He told of the spelling bee, saying, "I knew he was wrong, but since he’s the vice president I went back to the blackboard and put an e on the end and went back to my seat."


Well, Dan Quayle did say: "I've never professed to be anything but an average student."

No kidding.

-----

Quayle can readily compete with Bushisms.


Just to remind you of some Bushisms:

"You work three jobs? … Uniquely American, isn't it? I mean, that is fantastic that you're doing that." —to a divorced mother of three.

"We’ve got an issue in America. Too many good docs are getting out of business. Too many OB-GYNs aren’t able to practice their love with women all across this country.”

"The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country."

“Peace will come to the Middle East only after everyone stops fighting.”

“To those of you who receive honors, awards and distinctions, I say, well done. And to the C students, I say: you too can be president.” Bush got into Yale with only C grades. Dan Quayle's major at college was political science, in which he mostly got D's.



And, er, Quaylisms:


A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls.

Bank failures are caused by depositors who don't deposit enough money to cover losses due to mismanagement.

Hawaii has always been a very pivotal role in the Pacific. It is in the Pacific. It is a part of the United States that is an island that is right here.

I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix.

I want to be Robin to Bush's Batman.

I was known as the chief grave robber of my state.

I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn't study Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people.

It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.

Republicans have been accused of abandoning the poor. It's the other way around. They never vote for us.

The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history... I mean in this century's history... But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century.

Votes are like trees, if you are trying to build a forest. If you have more trees than you have forests, then at that point the pollsters will probably say you will win.

We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world.


Can you imagine if Quayle had been VP to Bush dub-ya instead of Bush senior?



-----

Strangely, the other quote I came across today was George Orwell: The quickest way of ending a war is to lose it.
(The third quote I saw was - just to prove I'm not making this up - "Health food makes me sick" C Trillin. But I think I'll save the dangers of carrot juice and the toxic effects of overconsumption of Vitamin A for another thought provoking post if it's alright with you.)

I'm sure you heard the other day how Bush, who said in April 2004 that the current Iraq war could not be compared to Vietnam, now compares it!

He reckons that it would have been best if the US had stayed in Vietnam longer, completely ignoring the long held and popular belief that they should have left Vietnam years earlier than they did. And, like Iraq, probably shouldn't have interfered in the first place.

Also, it just brings to people's attention again how much a mess both wars have been regarding faulty US strategy and flawed decision making.

Yup, smart move.


Worse, he also compared the conflicts in Iraq to those in Cambodia:

"In Cambodia," Bush said, "the Khmer Rouge began a murderous rule in which hundreds of thousands of Cambodians died by starvation and torture and execution"

[Er...] The Khmer Rouge slaughter was not caused by the U.S. withdrawal from Indochina in 1973, but by the U.S. escalation of the war and intervention into Cambodia in the years prior to that time.

(Taken from this article.)

-----

Maybe ol' Johnny hangs around these dumb Yanks just to look rool intelligent (if also a bit short).

Mind you, Kyle Sandilands would probably look bright and fair-minded against the likes of Bush and Quayle.

Oh most awesum joy!

...

[WARNING: DISTURBING IMAGES FOLLOW]

Seeing this headline a moment ago made me so happy:


Enough Rope: Denton makes Kyle see red

"It's been months in the making and is still two weeks away from going to air, but chat show champion Andrew Denton and shock jock Kyle Sandilands finally faced off in the Enough Rope hot seat on Monday - and fireworks flew."



Here's some of the article:

Following the meticulous interview technique that has made the veteran journalist king of the craft, Denton reportedly left an angry Sandilands "stuck for words" as he probed the FM host about the importance of taking responsibility for his actions.

Fuelling the fire, Denton also played a clip from the 2007 Logie Awards, where comedian Dave Hughes called Sandilands "a massive dickhead".

Denton then asked his guest what he thought of Hughes - to which Sandilands retorted: "I hate him - the next time I see him I'm going to punch him in the throat."

Er, tell me if I'm wrong, but can't that possibly kill someone?

ABC insiders confirmed that Sandilands left the studios in a hurry as soon as filming had finished - which his publicist yesterday attributed to him having to board a plane to travel interstate.

"Denton always gets controversial but Kyle definitely wasn't upset or uncomfortable with the interview - he thought it was great," she said.

Oh, oh!

Ahahaha...

Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaa!

*holds sides as laughing becomes painful*

Hoo hoo.

Hee.

Heh...

Oh.

His poor, poor publicist.


I mean, did anyone else see his visit on Big Brother? What the woman must have to put up with! Things get the teeniest big tough for this guy or he can't have everything his way and he dummy spits.
As my grandfather would have said, 'He's weak as piss and twice as salty'.

Mark your calendars!!!!! ABC on September 3.

I can't wait!

...

Can't get enough of them strippers now! Oh yeah!

As I seem to be Davey's sole source of important Oz news topics whilst he's living it up overseas (the rotten sod) I will update the Rudd stripper shenanigans.




1. Rudd's sis-in-law has revealed herself to the world.... well, BrisVegas at least.
Yes, she was an 'exotic dancer' (they keep putting that in inverted commas so I'm guessing they mean a stripper who's not likely exotic* and probably not dancing so much as exposing her biggest organ - - - heh. You've never heard it put that way before have you?

...Have you???)

The effect Mrs Rudd's revelations may have on the opposition leader's approval ratings is unclear, with a new poll showing his lead has continued to increase.


* [UPDATE] Dang. Ben has pointed out that she is exotic. What are the odds eh? She was born in Botswana (I have some beautiful Agate from there) and her lovely exotic name is Okhola. How wrong am I?
Will add here that I have nothing against exotic dancers whether actually exotic or otherwise. I believe one of my fellow bloggers has done so before and I can imagine doing it in my younger years... although, back then I was even more likely to be giving any man who looked at me the evil eye so I may not have lasted long.
Even today I would consider being one of those dancers who are in those little box rooms in the walls behind glass, wearing awesome underwear, corsets and garters and stockings and such. I like dancing. That would be cool. No one could touch you either.

2. More exciting is that ol' Kev has been revealed as 'rowdy'. Well woo-hoo and yee-ha I say.

Meanwhile, the owner of the Scores strip club in New York has described Mr Rudd's infamous visit, labelling him "rowdy, snotty and uppity".


But not really rowdy, you know, as in actually rowdy at all (apart from the occasional loud "Yeee-hawww" that is)...

Although the venue's owner, Elliot Osher, did not like Mr Rudd's character, he said he did not get into any altercations with staff.

"I looked online and they started putting a lot of baloney reports out there and I'm the owner of the club and I'm there and I'm telling you this guy did not touch a girl, and he was not thrown out, and he acted like a gentleman," Mr Osher told the Courier Mail. "Nobody in the party touched a girl.

But yes, snotty as in snotty, as in snooty (this is sounding like Ferris...).

I must say this is the only point about all these revelations that has quite dismayed me.

"The people he was with, you could tell they had a few drinks, and they were just acting snotty, you know uppity. Like: 'Get me this, get me that'."

Yeah, cause Yanks are renowned for always saying 'please' and 'thank you'! And in polite and quiet tones at that.

3. Not only has he been drunk twice in his life but has been to strip clubs twice. Talk about rowdy!

Mr Rudd has said he only attended a strip club once before, when he was at university.

Yes, and that was only for a supervised field trip... or something... Research paper?

4. Everyone else is wanting to get in on the act seeing as Rudd's popularity is so far going up more than down.

Such as:

JOHN BRUMBY

Premier John Brumby said his last visit to a strip place would have been in the 1970s when he was a student. "It was probably in Sydney, three decades ago with a group of mates, male and female," he said. "That's the main reason people go to Sydney, isn't it?"


Ms Gratton adds:

BRENDAN NELSON

ALEXANDER DOWNER

Brendan Nelson has done it, when he was 20. Alexander Downer says he has never done it when on official business.



GOUGH WHITLAM

Although he only does it the French way as he prefers places where lasses are exploited in la dee da fashion: "where the exploitation of women is very tasteful" and "Nothing so crass as they have in New York."

Talk about 'snooty'!


BUT...


SURPRISE SURPRISE...

Tony Abbott won't talk about whether he's done it, because he doesn't want to fib. And nobody quite dares to ask John Howard whether he's been to a strip club. The

Prime Minister was tight-lipped."I have nothing to say about it," he said.




5. Glenn Milne is sounding pretty dumb, as per usual.

Re this 'scandal' coming from the Libs., seeing as some had sneakily referred to it in a scary fashion in Parliament and that it has just suddenly been publicly announced only weeks out from an election. You know, obviously just a coincidence.

Milne said: "I won't comment on sources at all except to say … that it was outside political circles, that it was around, so it certainly wasn't placed by the Government."

So if it has been 'around' why bring it up now?


Milne also hinted he believed there was something in claims he reported of Mr Rudd behaving inappropriately. Col Allan has said it was a gentlemen's club and Mr Rudd behaved like a "perfect gentleman". But Milne said Allan had a wicked sense of humour and his words should be looked at closely.

Yeah... Uh huh. Okaaaay.




6. But Bob Brown makes more sense than anyone and has the winning comment.

Greens leader Bob Brown said the issue should be kept in perspective. "Four years ago Kevin Rudd got drunk and took himself into a strip club," ... "Four years ago John Howard, sober, took Australia into the Iraq war. I think the electorate can judge which one did the more harm."

On ya Bob!

...

Kev: "Shake what yo mamma gave you, baby!"

I've changed my mind. I'm not voting for Kevin Rudd now. He visited a strip club in New York. Four years ago. Tsk.


Seriously though, such news loses some of its impact when we knew Libs had some dirt on him they were waiting to reveal, and apparently Julia Gillard too (what? she was the stripper!!!?).

Honestly, after the initial hoo-ha most people will surely think to themselves, 'OK. He is presenting himself as the next Prime Minister, quite a big deal yes, but this is all the dirt on him? That's it? That's the best the Libs have got?'


After such ponderings people may next try to picture John Howard in a strip joint...





Hee. Yes, that gave me a good chuckle too.















Of course Johnny wouldn't need to go as I'm certain Jeanette does a regular show for him at home, being the devoted wife and all. She'd be oiling herself up, putting on the heels and garter, feather boa. *cue music*

The minute ya walked in the joint. BAA DA!! I could see you were a man of distinction, real big spender...

*jiggle jiggle*

*shimmy*

"Hee hee. Oh Jeanette!"





Sorry. You weren't eating while reading this were you...?



---

Anyway, a couple of things had me a bit shirty this morning (pun likely subconsciously intended).


1. The Big Sensational News Story was 'broken' by Glenn Milne. Ahem...

2. Glenn Milne is queried about the glass houses aspect on Insiders and says well, he's not running for PM. But then he backs this up with a list of qualities that are important for high-ranking politicians and they were all equally viable qualities for journalists! Why did no one point this out to Mr Milne?!! (I said my piece loudly to the telly but was rudely ignored.)

3. I switch over to Nine to see if Rudd is still being interviewed on Sunday. Catch the end of the interview. Hear that news headlines will be after the ads so wait for them.
News headlines: what Rudd said before the ad break, he'd been to a strip club; show footage of him in studio a few minutes ago; end news headlines. Another tirade aimed at the telly and enforced by a few expletives regarding the quality of Channel Nine reportage and journalistic integrity, and a firm switching off of said telly. (I showed them.)

---

In some ways this news re Rudd actually confirms his goody-goodyness. He has explained that he was a bit drunk and that it was only for the SECOND TIME in his LIFE! Good grief. How much more straight laced an Aussie male could you ask for? (OK, well, after Johnny... aaand Abbott...)



Anyway. I'm sure he only went there for the ladies renowned (according to the owners) conversational delights:

The SCORES officers Management will ensure that licensee’s of the “SCORES” brand name maintain the highest standards of operation particularly with their performers in the areas of personal appearance and personality as well as the ability to interact intelligently with customers and engage them in meaningful conversation.

Uh huh.

Check Out My Very Own Snow Dome!!!

-- I HEART The Man at the Pub --

Look!!! Viv... Perth skyline... and even my requested silver glitter!!!


Is The Man not The Man?


Is he not just so much awesomeness!?



*cuddles snow dome*



*shakes gently*



*giggles with glee*

____________________________________

*trumpets*

The EB Snow Dome has been Proudly Presented to the 1000th visitor
Dune Princess.

She has received the award with much delight and has graciously presented it upon her blogge with much pride and oh most awesum joy.
A very deserving recipient.

*applause*

_____________________________

...

9 Lives Baby!! Wait, nope 8. Oh shit, 7. ...6?

...
When I was a wee lass of about 2 or 3 I had a wicked sense of humour. I most laughed myself silly at my grandparents' house when I would play and frolic with Tom, their cute little black and white cat.

Years later however, as an older child, I would visit them and every single time Tom would attack me in a screeching, frenetic claw-lashing assault. I would screech in reply and then we'd both flee in panic.

He scared the crap outta me.

For most of my childhood I believed cats hated me. Finally someone explained why Tom despised me with such a hissy and aggressive passion. Mum: 'You mean you don't remember?'


When I had earlier 'played' and 'frolicked' with Tom it was in the kitchen. (BTW, these are the grandparents with the bees and scary dinner table etiquette - now add to the list of hazards aggressive felines; and snakes, spiders, giant glaring horses (and some pretty imposing ponies... hey, I was little) AND the trampoline springs, all coiled and ready to bite.)

Anyway. My Nan's kitchen cupboards were a long way above the tiled floor and so my grandmother used the space to store crates of her potatoes and onions. Dark, airy, perfect. Apparently such conditions were also perfect, for Evil-Mini-Eleanor at least, for a darn good game.

Somehow, I would get Tom cornered under the cupboards and would giggle myself into delirious merriment as I threw potatoes and onions at him. Smack!

Thud!

BAM!

MeeorRRRRR!!!

Heeheeheeheeheeheeheeheehee!!!


I loved it.







Used up a few of Tom's lives though. Poor Tom. Well, he got me back pretty good.

Cat karma baby, don't mess with it.

I'm the blogger to see for Hot Gay Dwarfs, baby!

Ooh, have finally had a peep at my stats and I see I'm at 996 visitors!

[Hey, I've only been on here since May; that anyone comes here is a marvel to me (you wonderful souls you!).]

I will have to persuade The Man at the Pub to make me a commemorative plate (he's good at that stuff).


Actually. No... I think I'd prefer a commemorative snow dome, perhaps with blooms or petals instead of snowflakes. Well maybe some silver glitter too - you know, coz I wants it ta be classy.

***If you suspect you are the 1000th visitor, send your snow dome request to
The Man at the Pub (I'm sure he'll be thrilled).***

Anyway - re stats - having a gander at referrals was interesting.

When I've checked before the search queries have been pretty dull. A lot of people come here looking for Ian McEwan (re my 'burn this book before you read it' book review). Probably some studious school students or something. Poor things. I don't think I'll have helped them much.


I also would guess I have considerably failed the lost souls who came here hoping to find:

"Hot gay dwarfs"


"Bosom betties" (?)


Info regarding: "ejac under water"


"Dwayne Johnson tight pants"


"bitch free fuck"

They all come with colourful mental imagery don't they?



Now, that last one... This person is wanting to find a bitch to fuck for free...? How much of a bitch can she be if she's handing roots out to random internet perves for free?!

Or, perhaps he is just a gentle soul trying to find a 'fuck' that is free of nasty, cruel ladies? The poor love has made 'sweet-sweet-candy' to too many heartless wenches and is just looking for a lovely lass to cuddle up to.

Yes. That sounds nice. I'll go with that. La la la la la....





Before I go, I'll bring your attention to the fact that I've bowed to public pressure and returned to looking like Vivien Leigh. I'm really very lovely now.

*preen preen*

Again I say, who could compete with this:













Although, this is my fav pick of her:











Feel free to think up some apt LOL Kitteh speak.



BTW. Have I told you how nice *ahem* I was to cats as a babe? No? Will add it to another post then.





***********

P.S. Is another NEW POST BELOW. I hope you will read it and follow the links (look, really, how often do I ask this of you? NEVER. No. So it must be important. Yes. I'll be clear: this is doing no one a favour - except yourself... IMHO at least).

True life, spirit, suffering, love, loss & strength

HEY, have you READ about Mai's life yet?

Here is a Woman who has died a few times,
experienced torture,
known murder (of those she loves; AND has inflicted it rightfully upon a vile scum of a [man] in self-defence).

Plus her life experiences are full of love and magical occurrences.


If she weren't a few continents away I would, literally, bow at her feet. I don't know anyone who has as much life and spirit and fire and strength and soul and love and beauty as Mai.

She has my love and blessings always.

And just for being who she is.

Mai (my inspiration)

Please, go & read some of Mai's life-stories. They are very moving. She's warrior, heroine & saint (not that she'd say so); plus the history is important.

LINK


...

NICE GUYS

I never know what I think about something until I read what I've written on it. - William Faulkner

I'm always hearing how the nice guy never 'gets' the girl. I understand why this appears to be so. I've gone out with both the creeps and the nice guys.

In my life experience the nice guys have also been the creeps; they were just appearing to be nice, cause that's how they got by in the world. They're known as 'good old such and such', everyone likes them. And this is how they get away with being manipulative and controlling.

I chose to go out with (and then m-m-m... really commit to) a particular 'nice guy' particularly because he was a 'nice guy'. (Really he was not nice, more of a con man because he was actually heartless and controlling. See? Creep!) But, I thought I was being smart. I wasn't going to make that mistake again of going for the other type, the tougher or meaner guy. Of course, I thought they were nice too at first, but I was aware they had other sides to them too. Rough around the edges. Sometimes these rough edges were exciting. So I suppose it could be true that we often see 'the nice guy' as bland or dull...?



Many women don't think enough of themselves to be with a truly nice guy. We often have such a low opinion of ourselves that it would be just plain crazy to be with a guy who sincerely thinks we're great and of value. He must be nuts to look at us as special! What's wrong with him!!? So, this is often why we end up with the less-than-nice guy. He will perhaps say nice things to us - and we all want that - but really he knows our worth is less than his. We know our place and he does too.

In addition to, or instead of this, I think we pick the not-so-great guy because, well, us ladies are nurturers. We might see a guy's flaws but instead of thinking, 'Oh, this guy really needs to work on himself before he's any good for a relationship. He can't take care of himself at all. He. has. got. issues!'... We will instead think: 'Oh, isn't he sweet? He can't even take care of himself! What the poor love must have gone through... what pain he must be in! He needs my love... etc, etc.)'


Why do we do this? Again, I'm guessing it's cause we feel it gives us some worth, we feel needed. We are useful. And we are most useful of course, to the guys who are the biggest wrecks. (Of course these guys just lap it up, let us do all the work in the relationship and they never 'evolve' or 'heal' - instead it's the girl who begins to fall in a hole. And! Then! the nice guys look at this and think, 'Why is she wasting herself on that piece of shit?! I would never treat her like that!! etc, etc.')


Another reason we may go for the creep (who obviously has a heart of gold under there somewhere, he just need us to help him find it...) is because he may appear to be more exciting and/or more interesting.



Of course, all of this can come under the heading: Women who have been messed up by Daddy. Fathers have a massive impact on their daughters. Once I understood this, so much of my own 'stuff' became clearer.

What I'm saying is we find guys like 'daddy', men who will treat us as poorly as our fathers did. Firstly because that is what we know, is all we know of men, so anything else doesn't really turn-up on our radar. Secondly it's because by (unconsciously) putting ourselves through the same shit again we eventually learn how to get ourselves out of it. [Eg. one of my issues with my father is that he neglected me, he wasn't 'present' in the relationship, so I've found men (even when deliberately picking 'the nice guy'!) who will also ignore me and are not present in the relationship; so by going through that over and over I eventually learn that I deserve better and see that just because 'daddy' neglected me doesn't mean I am worthy of neglect, and learn to develop self-worth, etc, yadda, yadda, yadda, blah, blah, blah...]


Anyway...


I've been thinking that, apart from the above (which everyone already knows), some nice guys perhaps are often less attractive to women because we sense they don't have a richness of spirit. Yeah, some guys are just plain shallow and dumb. That makes sense. No, not just that, what I'm getting at is that maybe we sense there isn't enough depth to some of these men. And this is important because us wonderful women, complex creatures that we are, want someone who will dare to take the time and make the effort to delve into and understand our depths, our complex nature.

This surely sounds dumb to many of you and maybe I'm not putting it very well, but I'm learning more lately about the nature of women. We have more than one side to us. We don't want to be understood merely on our social or shallow level; at face value only. We want a partner to be unafraid to see our darker side; to dare to peer into our inner world.


Of course many women, with some dark and sad issues still to deal with, would also want to avoid this type of man cause she may be fearing these aspects of herself and doesn't want to be with someone who might see them.


But still, I like this idea cause I think it can go both ways (see, now you're getting excited!). It's more about people being ready to really get to know someone else in a relationship. To be profound enough in their own life, understanding their self and selves, so that they can dare to see these darker or deeper sides of someone else.



So, maybe it's not about whether a guy is nice or not. Maybe it's just waiting for the person - this goes for men and women - who has delved through their own issues, their own shit, and got their act together enough that they're not afraid to delve into the depths of their own nature. And by being open to their own complexities they are willing to make the effort to see and understand someone else's. To dare to know someone's true nature; even with all its wildness and paradoxes. It can be scary and take some time and effort. Most of us can't be bothered with that or are too frightened.




Anyway, I've rambled on enough. I guess nice guys just have to understand that a lot of us lasses are too down on ourselves to accept someone who values them. And us lasses have to understand that a lot of guys are too messed up to be good for us, or beyond 'saving'.
So, in between, must be the souls that have done their hard work and sorted themselves out enough to be ready to really have a relationship. I suppose it needs two such people to come together for a deeper and profound connection to take place. By then we should have learnt enough about our own flaws and how to accept them, so that we can do that for someone else. ...Learned to accept that we are complex creatures but worth understanding, so that we can then do that for someone else. And on and on, etc.



Well, anyway, I want someone who is a - genuinely - nice guy but who also has great courage and depth too. And to be damn interesting! Some nice guys only have one side to them. I want to see all sides, and I want him to even know about all his sides. And I want him to be interested enough in me to take the time to get to know all of my complexities too, my wilder sides and all that. (And I'm hoping I won't settle for anything less.)



Jeez, that makes sense doesn't it?

[/end mushy ravings]

I know the answer! The answer lies within the heart of all mankind! The answer is twelve? I think I'm in the wrong building. - Charles M. Schulz

I am no artist (& no Vivien either *sigh*) NOW with UPDATED Political Commentary!!!

Oops. It appears I accidentally gave you lot the wrong message the other day. My new pic is not some artistic creation of mine. Sorry! Just a photo of me, made to appear comic-like (cause I really prefer being a drawing thank you) by the click of my camera's software 'Cartoon' button. I apologise if I gave anyone the impression that I actually have some artistic talent or any creative skills whatsoever (hey, I clicked on them buttons real fancy like! it's all in the wrist you know.).
Pic of me + Scribbly lines all over = Much better. [EDIT 9Aug: 1.5 photos removed - Told ya!]

PS - I prefer Vivien too (really, who could compete?!). She will return!!!!














PPS - Just had a lovely laugh watching Howard on 7.30 Report again. (Kerry was cackling too.) Oh our PM's an absolute hoot lately: "No, no no... But... but... But Kerry!!" Old and 'rattled'??! Naahh!!!

UPDATE: 7.30 REPORT TRANSCRIPT NOW AVAILABLE - just a snippet:

[Only the comments in CAPS are mine, they do the rest themselves.]

KERRY O'BRIEN: Now to your own problems, Mr Howard? I know that you've tried to reject the leaked findings of your own pollsters this week that you're regarded as dishonest, but if that's how people see you then that's a real problem for you, isn't it?

JOHN HOWARD: Well Kerry, I won't be a commentator [commenter?] on that. I will deal directly with the issue. I'm not dishonest. [blah blah WMDs etc]

KERRY O'BRIEN: Have you asked your pollsters to find out why the public thinks you're dishonest?

JOHN HOWARD: No, but Kerry, I will deal with the facts I will deal with the allegation. I am entitled... I AM ENTITLED!!!!

*pouts*


KERRY O'BRIEN: It's not so much an allegation it's what your pollsters are telling you about the public perception.

JOHN HOWARD: Well, it's used in the question as an allegation. DON'T YOU GET TRICKY WITH ME YOU YOUNG WHIPPER SNAPPER! I'M ONTO YOU... I'm asked to say what do I think of the allegation that I'm dishonest? Well my reply to that is to say I'm not dishonest and I've grabbed hold of one of the examples of where I'm alleged to be dishonest. I mean, you will acknowledge that I have a right to defend myself. I HAVE A RIGHT TO DEFEND MYSELF!!!

KERRY O'BRIEN: But of course.

JOHN HOWARD: In what I regard as a false claim and I think I owe it to the Government supporters who watch your program, BOTH OF THEM, and I owe it to other people who are taking an objective interest in political debate in this country, to deal with those sorts of allegations. I OWE IT TO THE PEOPLE!!!!



KERRY O'BRIEN: But I suppose what I'm asking you is not so much an allegation but a finding by your pollsters that there is a strong perception out there amongst voters who are deserting your party that they think you're dishonest and I was asking you whether you've asked your pollsters to try and pin down the reasons why they think you're dishonest?

JOHN HOWARD: I certainly don't intend to go into what I have and what I haven't asked my pollsters YOUNG MAN. But I would have thought the best way to deal with that question is to address the substance of the alleged perception and that is what I've done. NOT THAT I'M GOING INTO WHAT THAT PERCEPTION ACTUALLY IS CAUSE I WON'T COMMENT ON IT...

KERRY O'BRIEN: You raised one element of what you think might...

JOHN HOWARD: Well, let me go into the other quoted examples. Children overboard [blah blah, bloody advisers *shakes fist*]

KERRY O'BRIEN: Is this what your pollsters are telling you that those are the kinds of reasons why people don't believe you?

JOHN HOWARD: No, I read them all the time in the newspapers.

KERRY O'BRIEN: No, no, I'm talking about what your pollsters have told you.

JOHN HOWARD: No, I'm saying I'm not going into what my pollsters have told me.

KERRY O'BRIEN: Of course if that perception of dishonesty is there, then the more desperate you appear to get with your promises or your interventions, the more that perception of dishonesty is going to haunt you, isn't it?

JOHN HOWARD: Kerry, you say my interventions are desperate but which ones do you...

KERRY O'BRIEN: No, no, I'm saying that the more desperate you appear to get...

JOHN HOWARD: With my interventions?

KERRY O'BRIEN: With your promises and your interventions, yes.

JOHN HOWARD: Can you give me some of the examples that are desperate?

KERRY O'BRIEN: Well, let's take the case of the hospital and I'm talk about perceptions, Mr Howard. Let's take the case of the hospital at Devonport. You said that decision had nothing to do with holding on to a marginal seat.

JOHN HOWARD: No, I didn't say that.

KERRY O'BRIEN: You haven't said that?

JOHN HOWARD: No, no, YOU NINNY, I was asked about isn't it coincidence in a marginal seat. My reply to that is well if it's a good policy, if it also has the impact of BUYING ME VOTES AND being popular what's wrong with that?
*laughter in background*

KERRY O'BRIEN: Well you've now got one of your own Tasmanian Liberal senators, Stephen Parry, telling journalists today that he thinks the hospital is a disaster and it should be closed.

JOHN HOWARD: Well, he's given me some slightly different version than that.

KERRY O'BRIEN: And what's that?

JOHN HOWARD: Well, I'm not going to go into that as a discussion between us. But, can I tell you the Government's policy is to go full steam ahead with the intervention.

KERRY O'BRIEN: Did he tell you he supports your intervention?

JOHN HOWARD: Can I say... well he's put out a statement... *SIGHS* Can I say that the Health Minister, Mr Abbott, went to Tasmania today and had a meeting with the Tasmanian Health Minister and to say the least the Tasmanian Government is being extremely uncooperative, which I think is very poor. *TSK* I would have thought the Tasmanian Government would have welcomed with open arms the fact that we are willing to USE THEM TO BUY VOTES, inject up to another $45 million to $50 million a year into the health system in northern Tasmania and for the Tasmanian Health Minister to say in effect well, we're going to spite the Federal Government because we don't like the idea of the Federal Government BUYING VOTES being involved, shows an arrogant disregard for the interests of MY PARTY the people in Devonport and the people of northern Tasmania.

KERRY O'BRIEN: Mr Howard, the Tasmanian Government, as you well know, is acting on two independent reports in implementing its health decisions and its health profile for Tasmania. There's a lot of sentiment in Burnie next door about the rights an wrongs of your intervening in Devonport, aren't there?

JOHN HOWARD: But Kerry, let's just look at the objective facts, AS THIS IS MUCH MORE CONVENIENT THAN ANALYSING THE BIGGER PICTURE OR MY TRUE INTENTIONS, I mean we are willing to inject $45 million to $50 million into keeping that hospital at full bore as far as public hospital facilities are concerned and instead of sitting down and cooperating with us, the Tasmanian Government so far, and I hope it changes its attitude. There has been agreement for the health officials of the Commonwealth and the State to meet not later than Thursday of this week. They are, you know, playing denial politics, they're playing spite politics. Well, I just ask them to think of the [VOTERS] people, the tens of thousands of [VOTERS and] people who will benefit from this decision [ME AND MY PARTY]. That's the point I'm making.

KERRY: *rolls around on the floor laughing holding his sides in pain as tears roll down his cheeks*

HOWARD: *right eye starts to twitch*



Honestly, should we vote him back in just for entertainment value?

This is terrible news!! I need a drink...

Just watched the ABC news. Apparently 2 million Australians are giving themselves brain damage by drinking too much. Based on the reliable evidence of my family and friends, I'd say that's a wholly accurate and possibly conservative estimate.

The news' example was a guy who used to drink a bottle of vodka and a slab of beer a day. Apparently this gave him brain damage.

No fucking kidding.

Yeah, he's a great example. Surely no one ever thought that a bottle of spirits and a shitload of beer daily might be doing them that kinda harm. I mean, you'd have thought the liver damage would've knocked you off the perch way before then!


The point of this study is that you may not realise how little alcohol it takes to inflict such a negative impact upon your brain funtion. 6 bevvies daily for the blokes (therefore my last beau was and is likely suffering brain damage *restrains self from commenting further upon this*), and only 3 for us ladies.


As the papers have noted: More than 200,000 Australians are living with undiagnosed permanent brain damage caused by drinking alcohol.

Quite a low number really considering a significant percentage of that would be my mother's side of the family. (Hey, this new study explains a lot...)


Anyway, after the news was 7.30 Report getting all excited about how much teenagers are drinking. As if this is NEWS.
AND they're going to parties where alcohol is available. No! Really?!

I'm not sure I see what has changed in the last 15 to 18 years since I was a teen and took vodka to school in my lunchbox.


**********

PS - In case you're concerned for my brain these days, *wipes drool from chin* although some damage may have occurred during my younger years (really, the acid concerns me more than my frequent imbibing of Southern Comfort), today I only allow a moderate amount of alcohol to pass between these lips and only once or twice a week at that.

*pats self on head*


PPS - I've had a bit of a shitty day, so today is one of those days. (But I've added lime juice to my vodka, so it's pretty healthy really...)

*pats self on head again*


*feels dizzy*


*wipes more drool from chin*


*decides to stop patting head*


*lies down*

Super-Procrastinator Girl!!!

Due to a pressing need to frantically procrastinate I've made myself into a comic book character/heroine (as supported by peer-reviewed stat.s [see Table 1.1 right]).

Do I look tough? Like I'd kick ass? Like I could gouge out your eye with a dainty yet deadly stilettoed heel? Like I could change my attire merely by spinning round and round and round really, really fast?
Or do I look plain blurry and trashily pixilated? (Remarkably accurate really considering that's exactly how I'm feeling... possibly due to an overindulgence in recent consumption/s of vodka and Grand Marnier-lashed ice cream [see last post])

For my next busy, time-filled procrastination I will create a matching super-heroine action figure, complete with assorted dazzling accessories. Apart from a variety of colourful capes and externally-worn knickers these are likely to include: a tired and dusty notebook computer, a dazed expression from photo editing, snazzy tortoiseshell spectacles (to hide secret identity), assorted tomes and newspapers (to complete the nerdish persona she secretly hides behind), and an invisible super-jet (they're cheaper that way, plus environmentally friendly and simply packaged). And perhaps an invisible boy-wonder companion (really the best kind; save a lot of hassles...), and maybe a fluffy pet of some description (cause, you know, I'd like a pet, a bunny or dog or cat or something, maybe a fur seal or two, a flamingo... but don't feel I could responsibly commit to one right now as I am likely unable to stay in one place long enough to give it a stable home... *coughs* due to the fact that I'm *ahem* rather busy saving the world and all that).


Anyway, enough procrastinating. *sigh* I'm off for a nanna nap...

**********

The 'Net is a waste of time, and that's exactly what's right about it. (William Gibson)

I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours. (Jerome K. Jerome)

Just wondering...

1. Is it normal to have vodka and ice cream for dinner?

2. Is it common to feel the urge to puke when those dreary slow-motion ads for Idol come on the telly? Ie. effect is esp. bad when slow pan is of a dazed Marcia Hines and *urk* hollow-headed Kyle *imph gak*. (I mean really, is there anything behind those vacant eyes of his? He seems to be rather low on the ladder of evolution. Methinks this may be his soul's first incarnation.)

3. Is it acceptable to collect your mail but not get around to opening it for several days?

4. Is it usual to wish we could all go about our daily business wearing a different wig - hopefully colourful or flamboyant - each day if we so wanted without people creating a fuss about it? Or burst into song as we walk down the street if we so choose? Or suddenly dance with a stranger as one waits for the train?

5. Is it normal, when waiting in a long and quiet line in the bank, to have the overwhelming desire to loudly pronounce, 'WELL!!! We're a quiet lot then aren't we??! Isn't this DULL??!! Anyone want to start a sing-a-long while we're waiting??! Shall I begin..?'

6. Is it normal to find this amusing...





















Or is it just me?




Just wondering is all...


...

It can't be for real...

My television viewing was severely limited last night.
For the first time, and likely the last, I attempted to watch Carbon Cops on ABC.

I couldn't quite manage it.


Firstly, the guy was daily luxuriating in 30-minute long showers. With an old-fashioned Niagara-Falls-has-gone-nothing-on-this-baby shower head to boot. (...Huh?)

Next, the woman would rev up the heating only to have to open the windows when she got too hot. (Eh?) They taught her how to use the heating properly. (I imagine this consisting of: Here are the instructions. Read them.)


Next: I turned off the TV. Perhaps that was their initial aim? (Hell them Carbon Cops are sneakily efficient aren't they?!)